Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Strange Dream

Have you ever had one of those dreams that you just can't shake off after you are awake?
I had one of those dreams last night. It was strange, but parts of it were so vivid. I won't go into all of the dream, but only parts.
One part that I particularly remember, is that there were soldiers (from France, I think) and they carried swords. I had be-friended them and became good friends with the captain. He and his men were staying near my family's place. At some point, because I had lived over-seas and my family hadn't, he was commanded to kill me. He said he had to. I said that I understood, but went to bed (WHY would I do THAT!?). In my dream, I went to sleep (knowing me, if I was worried about something, the last thing I would do would be to sleep). At one point of this dream, I am sleeping but aware of the captain standing over me in front of his men, with my sword. I continued to pretend to sleep. The captain raised his sword and put it down. I was sleeping on my side. Then, the captain raised his sword again and ran it through me from shoulder to shoulder. In my dream, I heard and felt the sword cutting through bone and muscles. It was vivid and gross!
The captain turned to his men and said, "She's gone. Let's move". After that, my mother came downstairs and I said, "I'm still alive." She said that she couldn't believe that the captain ran his sword through me. In my dream, I defended the captain saying that at least he spared my life. He had to make it look like he killed me in front of his men.
Continuing with the dream, my mother takes me to the hospital after pulling out the sword. The hospital experience was strange in my dream, but they only put gauze on my two shoulders and sent me home. During this time, I was panicking, because I was supposed to be at practice for Gospel choir and taiko.
I finally make it there and one of my friends stops everything and accuses me for being late and not having any respect for the other members of the group. I turned around with my shoulders in gauze and apologized and then said that I had been stabbed. She rolled her eyes and said that I would do anything to get attention.
At this point in my dream, another member (who in real life was one of my college professors) begins to pray over us.
After the prayer, we are asked to turn in insurance info for some retreat. It is only required for those under 25, but they kept insisting that I couldn't go without the info. I kept arguing that I was older than 25, but they wouldn't believe me. I was then accused of lying about my age. I was accused of being nothing but a lazy liar and bringing the group down. I was then asked how I even got into the group because I probably couldn't even sing. At that point, a former professor from Chicago and another one of my friends both stepped forward and suggested that I perform a song right then and there. At this point, it was very noisy because people were milling about, but I sang anyway. By the middle of the song, everyone was quiet and listening. The first "friend" who talked to me couldn't stand that I was the center of attention and began playing a drum.
So what does all of this mean? I have no clue. If I were to guess, I would think that it means I am too nice of a person (in reference to an actual conversation with a friend this week). My friends tend to take advantage of me and push me around. If I stand up for myself, I am accused of being selfish. I am guessing that the sword through the back means that I am the target of backstabbing, but I am also loyal to my friends because I make excuses for them.
But these are just guesses.
Weird, huh?

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