Christmas Cake or Precious Gems?

Why is it that the value of a woman seems to diminish if she is single and over the age of twenty-five? Or worse, over thirty? Why are do others view us as possibly lacking, incomplete or problematic? Why do people want to know "what's wrong with you?" Most disturbingly, why do people always assume the worst? If I were a man, most would not think twice that I am still single.

Instead of being shunned, why aren't we praised for remaining single? Many of us are strong and independent. We are not married because we choose to take advantage of opportunities through education and careers. Many times, the guys can not handle this or are intimidated by this. Rather than give up on our dreams and settle with someone who is obviously not compatible, we choose to wait for the "right one" to come along.

In Japan, women over the age of 25 are referred to as "Christmas cake". Nobody wants it on the 26th after Christmas is over. The same applies to women: Nobody wants them after the age of 25. Why not? It's not like we suddenly turn into pumpkins. We don't begin to decompose at the age of 26. We still have a lot of life left in us.

I have spent most of my life around children. I adore them. If I ever have a child of my own, I will feel very blessed. I also enjoy male companionship. Never once in my life have I felt that my sole purpose in life was to attach myself to the first man who will have me and then dedicate myself to procreation. I am not saying that I am against marriage and becoming a housewife. What I am saying, is that this is a very important part of a woman's life, but it is only a small piece of who she is. So why should our identity be wrapped up in this one thing?

I am tired of being asked why I'm not married. I'm tired of people assuming that, since I'm single, I must have plenty of time for others (because it's assumed that whatever semblance of a life I have is not as important as my colleagues who have paired off with someone). People think that I must sit at home alone because I am single. People are constantly calling me for favors because I have no one to disrupt.

Whatever. My time is just as precious. Maybe I can be a little more flexible because I am single, but I still work hard and have a life.
The difference, is that I'm independent and smart. I have just chosen to wait for men to step up their game. I want to know that the man I choose to be with is strong enough to handle me working (if I choose) and sensitive enough to meet my needs. I also feel that I shouldn't have to lower my standards. I have never been married and I have no children. I know that it is almost unrealistic in today's society to expect the same, but I am willing to compromise to an extent. (Thankfully, I've found someone who meets my standard)
I'm not looking for a perfect man and we all know that I'm not a perfect woman. It just bothers me that so many people assume things. They don't look at the whole picture. They have not realized what it is that so many women already know: We aren't desperate, we just have standards. Many of us are strong enough to wait, even when the waiting is difficult.
So rather than refer to us as desperate and as Christmas cake, why not call us what we really are? We are precious gems.